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The MBA Bride | October 24, 2021

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Know a bride with commitment phobia? 4 steps to overcome a fear of wedding planning

Commitment phobia is often associated with a fear of relationships. You must be thinking, what an odd thing to discuss on this blog. But it’s worthwhile to consider those brides-to-be who have a commitment phobia to wedding planning.
Brides with commitment phobias are labeled as procrastinators and may feel like wedding planning is overwhelming and out of control. As a result, they do not take action unless forced. The last thing a bride needs to feel is out of control, trapped, insecure, pressured, or ‘swamped’ when making wedding decisions. Sound familiar? It does for me.

I’ve been engaged for 15 months as of yesterday. I only really started planning my wedding in August, 11 months after I got engaged. I have to admit that the first 11 months, I rattled my brains with the fear of not making the right choice, so I didn’t make any choices.

You may feel like wedding planning is too much. I know I did. But here are four steps I took to overcoming commitment phobia to wedding planning:

  1. Admit it. Wedding planning is a lot of work. It’s completely plausible to have anxiety when making decisions about your wedding. Even business savvy brides must admit that the emotions associated with wedding planning (which are typically absent from business making) can make them a commitment phobe. Don’t hide behind excuses; admit to yourself you’re afraid of wedding planning and identify what exactly gives you anxiety about it.
  2. Seek help. I’m not suggesting you talk to a shrink as you probably need a more speedy resolution for your wedding. Instead, talk to a wedding planner or a good friend who mastered the art of wedding planning. My biggest relief was hiring a A Modern Day Affair, the best and brightest wedding planners on Long Island to keep me on task and break down these gigundo tasks into itty bitty manageable pieces.
  3. Outsource the burdens. If something feels like its going to be just too much for you, outsource it. This was discussed in depth in a prior blog post entitled “Bridal Outsourcing.” Read up to learn how it can help you manage the bridal planning bear.
  4. Celebrate. Dive into a little party for yourself everytime you accomplish something for your wedding. Start small with the itty bitty decisions (i.e. you finally picked your nail polish for the wedding ceremony). Simply treating yourself to a candy bar, a glass of wine, or even a pedicure will encourage you to be more assertive and make more decisions.

Following these four steps will increase your confidence and make you feel empowered to make decisions for your wedding without anxiety.

Who will you seek help from in overcoming bridal planning commitment phobia?

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